TEAM Parenting (Part 7)

If you have read any of my entries on parenting you have probably noticed it’s nothing new and amazing. It’s basically stuff we all know, but maybe need to be reminded of. I really make observations during the week and then add them to my list. This week I want to add that I think is critically important. In order to be a more effective parrenting team…

#7 Stay connected and engaged as a couple

I believe the best way to have harmony as parents is to find that harmony first as a couple. It’s important that we take time away from our kids, and have “grown-up” talk. Spend time getting to know each other even more. I find when Jennifer and I get away we always seem to talk about something new, or I discover something about her I didn’t know. But I find that parenting together is much easier when we are investing in our relationship. The reality is this, I love my kids, but they will one day move out…Jenn is stuck with me forever. I hate the thought of our relationship being reduced to parenting, we are so much more than that.

Here’s a few things we do to try and stay connected and engaged as a couple:

1. When we go to a movie we get there 30-45 minutes early. We get into the theatre and it’s quiet and we talk…or make out. We have found this is a great time and place to talk because there is little activity around to distract us.

We are going to the movies today…the choices are Pineapple Express or Mamma Mia. I am sure you can guess which one I want to see. What can I say, I love musicals.

2. We value eating together as a family, and so most of our meals are the four of us together, it’s great fun. However, once a week Jennifer and I put the kids to bed and eat dinner-just the two of us.

3. I love sports and Jenn does too, but if I am watching a game she is not particularly interested in she will still sit on the couch with me and read…usually it’s PEOPLE magazine. But we are together.

4. We pray together (this happens more during the school year, we have slacked a little during the summer). In the mornings before the kids wake up we go downstairs, have a cup of coffee, and pray together. There is something about a connection spiritually…

5. We go to the gym together. We run on the treadmill, do light weights, and sometimes soak in the hot tub.

6. We fight…yeah I said it! We have enough trust in our relationship that we have “courage to conflict”. I find it’s a very healthy part of our relationship, it’s keeps the sparks going…